Willie Wonka, Independence, and the iPad

At 5 1/2 years old, my son finally watched Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.  This isn’t because I’ve tried to shield him from emotional trauma of Oompa Loompas, but because this was the first time that he wanted to watch it.  It was on TV.  Needless to say, earlier in the week he nearly refused to talk to me because he was on the toilet and did #2.  That’s not the big issue.  The big issue is that he still isn’t even trying to wipe.  I’m pretty sure I had it all figured out at this point.  My wife confirmed that we do have a third child on the way, and she’s worried about how she’s going to manage everything.  My first suggestion if I wanted my balls cut off is to get him to wipe.  She doesn’t want to hear those kinds of suggestions.  She lives by “pick your fights.”  To me that’s an excuse to not fight at all.  The same way that we potty trained him.  He turned 4 and we literally forced underwear on him.  Within a couple days, he was in the toilet.  I don’t know how we’ll do wiping the same way.  I digress.  Our daughter could probably be potty trained at 2.5, but she’s content to be in diapers, and only wants mommy to change her diapers.  She is also addicted to the iPad.  She throws a fit every time it’s taken away to charge.  I appreciate the thought of electronic gifts, but up until age 5, they need to be kept from kids.  The last part is that my wife cleans up their toys and doesn’t engage them.  If she would pick the fight and continue to press, they would eventually learn.  Instead they’ve trained her.  She looks to me for support, but what am I supposed to do if she doesn’t want the struggle with truth of the situation?  That brings me back to the movie.  When Veruca Salt disappears down the furnace shoot, the Oompa Loompas sing their song with the following Lyrics:

Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory – Oompa Loompa Song: Veruca Salt Lyrics

“Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-do
I have another puzzle for you
Oompa Loompa doom-pa-da-dee

If you are wise, you’ll listen to me
Who do you blame when your kid is a brat?
Pampered and spoiled like a Siamese cat
Blaming the kids is a lie and a shame
You know exactly who’s to blameThe mother and the father  (In big letters on the screen)

Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-da
If you’re not spoiled, then you will go far
You will live in happiness too
Like the Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-do”

Needless to say, I don’t want my kids to end up like the ones that Charlie survived.  I’m just going to need help to get it done.  It’s been my experience that people treat you with the respect you show, and the respect you demand in return.  The first is required to get the second, but it is a combination of the two that results.  The key to it all is really manners and sticking to them.  Asking please and saying thank you goes both ways.  I wish my wife would understand this when she whines about their whining.



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